*7/5/2017. Just updated with pictures!
It’s 2am in the night & no pictures because I have not upload them to my com yet. Just a word vomit of what happened throughout the day + some thought posts + my 3 years in poly before I forget everything the next morning!!
Yes, I graduated from Design School. The group of aliens who are a different species of people in the workforce, the group of people who think differently. A toast to the group of resilient bunch who stayed till wee hours just to finish up projects, or worse still, gone nights and nights without sleep. To the people who laugh at my bad fonts (yes I used comic sans), bad typography, or even my screams when my Illustrator crash & I forgot to save. To the people who knows what heartbreak is when you spent too much on printing. To the people who heart drops when video size is wrong, file size is wrong or when we saved everything in RGB when it’s supposed to be CMYK.
I have 9 pillars of support.
To Dahlia, who always calls me baby Grace and ask me for ATS code HAHAHA
To Karleng, who is always late but still remains so talented.
To Xinyi, who comforts me when I was at the lowest point at my life and when I cried in school almost everyday.
To Joy, for fighting with me and winning at every pointless argument.
To Jos, who always tell me, “please don’t last minute anymore”, “eh why you never bring jacket” because deep down you care for us. Thanks for helping me rush Motion Graphics during Alfred’s class; only that he caught me doing last minute work oops!
To Haz, who is the only one that can tahan my weirdness and still calls me Princess.
To Dawn, for the beer, the parties and the company. Thanks for tolerating me when I was blind in love. I know I’m not easy.
To Nab, my FYP partner, for going through hurdle after hurdle, challenge after challenge with me when we are about to collapse from Identity Crisis!
To Jengwen, my first close friend, thank you for these 3 years.
And you two. Poly would not be the same without both of you. I remembered the first day I knew Zaf like how it was yesterday. She came to T514 to find Jengwen and she thought I was Korean. She was holding some drawing that she drew. I asked if I could see it. It was crazily and nicely drawn. I remembered the Bintan trip where its the first time Zaf and I truly opened up with each other because we had no choice after being forced to sleep in the same bed.
Since we’re at the topic of the past, let’s throwback.
-My CF clique was Iris, Sinming and Jo. Then when we split into our courses my usual hangout was Jengwen & Zaf.
-I joined a lot of CCAs. I was in the strings ensemble, Astronomy Club, and Student Exchange Club.
-I was vain. (and quite childish)
-I was trying to prove myself wrong after being a loser in secondary school (both academically and socially)
I got cheated into SP thinking there was shuttle bus everyday that would ferry us around the school campus. It was convenient and right at the MRT and I liked SP because it was big. I remembered asking Jingwen what are the biggest polys then she said “NP and SP” & so I’m like “okay, SP it is.” HAHHAA.
I snipped off my hair right on the day before school starts. Not only that, I went for red highlights. Thought it was cool to try a new hairstyle and experiment but found out that my hairstyle cannot go well with dresses and skirts so I remained this tomboy look all the way. Fun fact: Many people suspected I was lesbian when school started but the funny thing is nobody came up to ask me if I was gay. LOL
Then came Sem2. Sem2 was vain because I was trying to change my style. Oh so vain. Was a very try-hard year, the thought of myself made me cringe now. Played with makeup.I did a lot of experimentations with my physical appearance—changed style, clothes and hairstyle so many times in Year 1.
This was all in year 1 but I look like 2 different persons. Wth
I also remembered I took ootd in SP almost everyday. Siao one.
Just few of the many OOTDs taken. And apparently my basic game was very strong because it was always the white wall. Just moved into the new Design school so it was very convenient la HAHHAA
My love for design grew in Year 1. I felt that I was finally at peace with myself after settling down to do something I really love and I was lucky to know what industry I wanted to be in for the rest of my life. I also lived Year 1 childishly because I had a lot of free time looool. Was always looking for fun and new places to go. As design school didn’t have exams, I didn’t study. I went cafe hopping in the weekends and hipster places in SG like haji lane, etc. I also had the time to chase after Hollywood singers like Lady Gaga, Ed Sheeran etc. Went for Taylor Swift’s concert in Year 1 and got so crazy. I even joined SP strings ensemble and learnt to play the violin. You can safely say after being a good student in secondary school for so long, I let loose and became a slacker. HAHAHA
I had my first relationship in Year 2. Wouldn’t go into details here but of course, it made me more mature. It was a pleasant relationship, nothing too dramatic and even when we broke up, we ended on good terms. I wouldn’t deny that a relationship would put you through a lot of challenges, issues about self-worth, insecurity, time management etc. Just a nice appetiser to the dating world, let’s just put it at that.
Year 2 made me stop being childish but I wasn’t that matured either LOL. But I no longer go mad about Hollywood singers and take #ootd everyday in SP ahaha. I became less vain because obviously appearance shouldn’t be one of the main priorities in life anymore.
In Year 2 I made a lot of friends and also quarrelled a lot and then lost a lot of friends. HAHHAHA I finally settled down and found my clique of 10 (my liu sha bao family) and they are like sorority sisters to me. I have many cliques in the past but none of them gave me the family feel. Even though we got mocked so many times by other people saying we’re like a secondary school clique and that it is very big, but I don’t care because I love my big clique hehehhe. I remembered when we book karaoke and enter in big groups, go to restaurants and take up the whole long table, and because we’re so big a clique; here’s to more looks of dismay when we enter the MRT making a lot of noise HAHAH.
The night for VAF filming! Eating on the streets like a hobo because we are….so..cool..
And these two which stuck with me through thick and thin.
Overall, Year 2 led me to think about life’s more deeper questions: Why do we exist? Why do I study design for? I just took my future more seriously. The workload in Year 2 piled up and that forced me to sit down and buck up. I took 8 main modules, French classes, diploma plus, and also had choir practices on Wednesdays. I had to buck up.
Year 3 was a fruitful year but the start of Year 3 was just very savage hahhah. Clubbing? Checked. Drinking? Checked. Siam Diu? Checked. Toxic Relationships? Checked. Bitch fights? Checked. Swear words? Checked. Heck, I even almost got caught by a security guard for sneaking into Zouk without ID. Year 3 sem 1—my lifestyle was just very unhealthy.
It was just a period of brokenness. Funnily, I also found comfort in the pain. I channelled my pain into creative energy and surprisingly got As for all of my modules that Semester (so weird right!!!)
I’m not saying what I did was right but that crappy period definitely put things into perspective for me now. Head to the section of this blog and you can see how I attempted to desperately veil my dirty linen with flowery English. I remembered I went to SP gym and SP pool with LiangKuang so often during my “broken period” because he told me exercising helps. I did pick myself up. Don’t worry.
The friends that gave me so much advice and love. They’re really a bunch I can count on. I like that whenever anyone have trouble in the group, the rest of us would just pitch in to help or even stand up for the person. HAHAH
I picked myself up in time for FYP. Year 3 I started travelling quite a bit so I was very fortunate. After my broken period, I found myself packing up to go to HongKong, with no parents, no plans whatever, just Celia & I. Alot of people asked me why I love HongKong. It was like a refuge place to me then. I remembered crying in HongKong then impulsively running to a salon to chop off 10 inches of my hair. That trip was a lot of fun, love and tears.
Subsequently, as I worked on my FYP, I went a mission trip to Myanmar, then Khao Yai, Thailand and stayed in 6 different hotels in the span of one month. Helped the underprivileged kids in Myanmar and that trip by my church made me feel God’s love for His people really strongly. Travelling helps me generate lots of ideas for my Year 3 projects.
HERE AND NOW
SP was definitely with me through my ups and downs. It’s one of the proudest schools I would mention that I have attended. Whether I was happy, or sad, or angry, I just had to drag my feet to school. There I found the support of lecturers, warmth of my friends and just overall, the comfort of the whole place.
Mixed emotions are not a rare sight during these kind of special occasions—happiness of course, nostalgia, disappointments (both at myself and people), awkwardness, fear (remembered getting so jittery before the event), anxiety (about the future)—but I’m sure Grad Day was one of the most fulfilling days ever. Though most of them are negative emotions, the positive emotions definitely still overwrote them. There were joy, excitement, anticipation, love and acceptance.
Worth celebrating on Star Wars Day?? Thanks Jan!!!
That being said, I made an observation on myself today. I do realise that people fulfil me. I feel the most happy when I feel the most love, the most acceptance and when I’m surrounded by friends and family I care about. Received bunches and bunches of flowers today and although gifts shouldn’t be a measure & defining factor of happiness, BUT today was definitely the bubbliest, happiest version of myself I have seen in a long, long time!!! I felt that I was radiating positive energy all the while. There was just so much warmth in my speech, in my actions, I felt that it was the personality of a girl whom I always wanted to be. I swear it was so liberating, the very essence of my soul might have just risen to the surface of my body instead of being hidden in the depths of my bowels, away from the world. I am an extrovert at heart that didn’t know how to be extroverted. I used to be one, of course, until something in the world just dimmed my soul and I felt that the light had went out. But today, however, I just went from clique to clique, answered call after call, it was so busy. And because I loved being busy, even I surprised myself.
My cf friends :”) First friends in poly….will never forget you guys and how you’ll always pester (and will continue to pester) me to sing karaoke.
My parents. I love you mum for cooking me supper when I ton the night for projects and ensuring that I never go hungry. I love you dad for always giving me ideas and supporting me in everything I do. I love your long text messages before submission days. I guess I have a lot of things to say, a lot of people to thank and a lot of memories in SP to reminiscence. Being in SP was the 3 years that I have grown a lot, matured a lot, experienced a lot, laughed a lot, screamed a lot and shouted a lot. There were alot of things I went through, but with SP, it’s So Possible.