读了“戏剧浮生”之后就觉得演艺圈和 design industry 都很相似：两种都是一门艺术，多少都要靠才华，其实书中提出的东西我都可以relate的。
“。。。我是一个喜欢思考的人，爱胡思乱想，即使自己一个人坐着，也可以不断思考，跟自己说话。” I do think a lot. I hate spouting nonsense. Wherever I’m alone, I find my mind whirring at top speed, like a helicopter’s rotor blade when its in the air. The engines and gears in my head, I could almost feel them, and it hurts sometimes but other times its overwhelming good. I think I conceive about 3-4 thoughts/ideas/words in just 10 seconds. It’s scary sometimes.
“所以有人问我下一步怕不怕失败，我会说我不怕，因为人生总会失败，我也只是在经历着。将来是否成功，从来没有保证，那就让我们经历吧！” 认为这个面对成功与失败的态度是非常值得我们学习的。If you don’t try, you’ll 100% fail. But if you try, there’s at least 50% chance of winning, I tell myself. There’s no guarantee that we’ll ever succeed in this life, and some people really do die without achieving anything much in life—it would not be safe to say that “we’ll eventually get there”. But think about it: failure is also an experience. And isn’t a fulfilled life to keep on experiencing and learning different things? If so, does success really matter?
Another thing whom the book addressed was my dilemma of choosing your own clients and projects I prefer versus the idea of taking in any work I could just for the sake of money. As designers, we are always on the lookout for exciting projects. Projects that inspires us. That break borders and give us breakthroughs. Brands that we stand for and people whom we are comfortable working with. I believed it was addressed in A manifesto too: do we really want to spent the rest of our lives using our valuable skills to advertise for cat and dog biscuits? We are all people who want to feel relevant to the world in the midst of our work. “生活的压力和生命的尊严，究竟那一样较重要？” 生活的压力当然指的是金钱上的问题：为了养家，生存，什么client或project 都要接。Beggars can’t be choosers!
The author—he was freelancing for about 4 years, with no contract, no stable income whatsoever. “所以当你在两个月里没开工是，任何一套「烂片」找上门来，你也会立即答应接拍，当时就有很多这样的情绪。” 我太了解了。现在毕业，大部分的时间都在家里，无事所做，不是闷就是restless. 黎耀祥试过整个月只开一天工。在那时刻怎么不会焦急，怎么不会担心生活? 在那时刻，我们不但要把生命的尊严放下，连演员（or 设计师，in my case）的尊严也要放下。
I designed this about 2 years ago, purpose of it is to urge designers to use their skills for a valuable concept, to make a difference, to change the world positively instead of abusing their skills for meaningless purposes. , 以上的 dignity讲的就是 “尊严” 了。From a student-turned-unemployed person, that has always been my stand. It is indeed painful to watch my status change like this. Some say you cannot choose unless you are at the top, and to get there you must be willing to work for anything. Especially when you’re jobless and doing nothing, you feel so jittery and anxious about your expenditure, and even your usefulness to the society is at stake. How can you then not, accept any design project that is in your way, irrelevant or not to your own interest and values?
I wish I could have a strong opinion, but I am still sitting on the fence regarding this one. That’s because I feel that your profession—especially if it has something to do with creating creative content—will brand you and also the things you create reflect what you believe in. It’s too precious to be trashed around like that. What are your thoughts?
We are the star of our own life. Think about it, because we are really the star of our own movie. We are the main character, because everything that’s experienced is centred around us. When people around us don’t act according to your own script, we get disappointed and upset.
Then in his book he talks about how he’s okay with death. How he does not fear death because everything he wants to accomplish is accomplished. He views death as an escape, that life has nothing to remain sentimental about. It may sound dull and negative, but I was really intrigued by it. What did he say that wrong anyway? Milan Kundera says that all we live once is once, that if it happens once, we have nothing to be sentimental about it. That is lightness. I don’t think I’m scared of death. Of course, it’ll be good to stay on, because i still have a purpose to live for and things I want to accomplish.
This really struck me, because it really describes me, as if I have been waiting for my whole life for the existence of that one verse. Often mistaken for a romantic, few people know that I’m a romantic only in prose. That I have poetic memory, that I view this world like a film and writes poetry. But not in relationships. I’m not going to deny that I’m a romantic by nature, in creativity and in thoughts. But not towards my relationships. Not towards my lover. That’s not to say I don’t give love, I just don’t give it in a way romantics do.
“讲到「感情丰富」时，演员需要对處身的环境有感觉，对身边所有的人，事和地都应该要有情，才能把人间的悲欢离合表达出来。” 无论什么事我都很容易产生兴趣，有深切的体悟。（of course，except for maybe maths and engineering) but other that that, I’m pretty open to music, the arts, books, films, history, whatsoever.
It is not difficult to evoke my empathy. and because of that, I dislike apathetic people. So damn selfish and yet I am so scared of them. not because they are heartless, I’m not saying that, because many are not, but because they are unable to feel or see the beauty of life on a whole new level. They understand your problems, but they might not be able to feel it.
书中提到: “人类不停地变，社会和世界都是不停的变”—two fold change。Funny thing that’s the thing I discussed in my Identity Crisis fyp when Nab and I researched on society/humans. Hmmm there are so many more thoughts I want to say about this book, so many things I wish to respond. Overall, it’s just a really good book talking about success, life, failure, death, and everything else in between. Definitely thankful that I have such an insight into an actor’s life and that really helped me to appreciate films better.