Hear my Battle cry

Gosh, it has already been a week since I came back to Singapore. I only have two weekends here in my lovely hometown before I fly back! Not only does time seem to move especially fast here, but things seem to change really quickly too. The beginning of February has been nothing but surprises at every corner. I am bombarded and hit everyday with fresh, different feelings from different friends, people and familiar places. I’ve also realised that I am adulting in about two months’ time. I will be twenty one. My mind can’t seem to wrap itself around how fast we are all growing, but at least there’s a comfort that living in Sydney has helped me grow (emotionally and mentally) to become the mature person I want to be.

Adulting also sheds light at the fact that our parents are growing old as we are growing up day by day. This time back, I realized my parents, especially my mum, has aged a lot. I haven’t seen her in six months and she changed so much…..seeing her like this breaks my heart. I feel bad for my parents who have to work so hard just to fund my education. I’ve always struggled with the thought of them working hard while I enjoy life. Sometimes I wish I didn’t go ahead to pursue a better education because it wouldn’t burden them so much. But an education is an investment too and I cannot be stuck in this cycle.

“We are not prepared for the adulthood where we have to watch our parents grow old” 

I am no longer a teen. My friends, one by one, are slowly turning legal. I’ve met countless friends within the past one week—Yeeyen, Julia, Celia—and I saw many of them in a different light as compared to before. I’d like to think of them as resilient, wiser, more mature. I started truly thanking God for such friends and then I realize how blessed I am, how much I can learn from them. I am not sure if they’ve changed or I’ve changed that cause me to see those positive traits in them. Maybe their inner beauty is already there all along, and that I’ve failed to see it, but now that I’ve seen it clearer because I’ve changed. I’ve learned to appreciate what is true beauty in my friends instead of judging them by their outward circumstances.

I just hope my friends live life joyfully and healthily. They deserve more than anything in this world.


 

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Finally completed watching this movie, Hacksaw Ridge by Mel Gibson. I love watching war movies because it showcases the very essence of humanity—what interesting things people would do at the event of life vs death. And usually, these interesting things are all kinds of inspirational, harrowing, selfless or evil.

Lots of people cried during this movie but surprisingly, I didn’t shed a tear. It was a movie I have put off long enough to watch because I know it’s so nice, I want to watch it properly and do it justice but couldn’t find the time to. Even though I didn’t cry, it doesn’t make the movie less good. I wish there’ll never be war in this world. I wish there’s peace wherever we go and lives won’t be lost in the face of the cruel reality of war.

Best quote in the movie, “I would say anyone is wrong to try to compromise somebody’s conviction…when you own a conviction, that is not a joke. That’s what you are.” I loved it because it resonates with me so much and because I have been tempted and assaulted to compromise before. My convictions have been challenged, put to the test. I felt threatened and offended. It’s not easy.

The thing is I didn’t realize this movie was directed by Mel Gibson, the same director who directed Braveheart! I haven’t watched Braveheart yet but I am shocked. Mel Gibson is a director I really love and since he’s famous for action films, it’s no doubt that it’s good. And another interesting fact is that it’s based off a true story! I am so encouraged because of this fact—every Christian should definitely watch Hacksaw ridge! It is truly a movie to think about suffering for Christ, being radical in a world like this (where everyone fits in), and the miracles God can work through our lives to inspire and help others. Not say if you’re a Christian in NS you should surrender your guns la but rather you can also think about God’s will for you and what it means to you in your personal situation.

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First they Killed my Father was deeply emotional for me. Unlike Hacksaw ridge, I bawled my eyes out for this one: maybe because there are children and family involved. What a soft spot I have for kinship!!!

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I watched this one in the airplane. I heard the book was good too but never really knew how loyal the movie was to the book. This true story, directed by Angelina Jolie had definitely changed my perception of child soldiers. I’ve always had a soft spot for children in third-world countries ever since I went to Myanmar for mission trips, and Cambodian children are always a group I wanted to reach out to. Seeing them work so hard and the harsh reality in the face of war pains me…I am also shocked at the amount of resilience a five-year-old can have. I am always confident in how people would behave in the face of adversity, how adversity can push people to their limits and make them do things they couldn’t imagine themselves doing. Things that they thought they never had the strength to. Things adults thought children never had the capacity to comprehend.

Very very good movie.

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