Forbidden love: The Crown Review

The Crown, as you know, is about the Royals, about the reign of the dazzling Queen Elizabeth as the main character, but perhaps what stole the show was the short-lived love affair between Margaret and Peter Townsend.

These star-crossed lovers got me a couple of times, with their subplot pulling at my heartstrings, I couldn’t help feeling indignant towards them.

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Their proposal for marriage faced strong objection not only from the state but also from the government body. As the church of England, royals like Margaret aren’t supposed to marry divorced persons like Peter. After waiting it out for 2 years with the hope that they’ll finally be able to marry, but that was not to be. These two are finally reunited; but they soon find themselves separated again, and this time, for good.

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I am no stranger to the concept of forbidden love. Perhaps I know the feeling that it comes like the dagger straight to my heart, that as a Christian, it is both against my parents’ wishes and God’s wishes to marry a non-Christian, someone outside the faith. You may think I’m silly, that in this modern age, nobody clings onto traditional values like this, but I don’t have a choice because my relationship with God is important to me as well.

I think the negotiation in today’s post does not lie in whether a Christian can marry outside the faith or not; but let’s assume we cannot, then the negotiation lies in divided loyalties, the party to blame. Should we be angry at God for prohibiting our relationship? Our parents? Myself? And sometimes it hurts because there is no one to blame at all.

Perhaps that is why when the time came for Margaret to choose, with great agony, between the call of duty and love; that I felt great pain for her—marrying a divorced person at that time was against the Holy Scriptures, the church of England didn’t allow it; and no matter how we matter dismiss these values today, they stand in face of their unique situation.

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Despite his record as a courageous fighter ace, [Townsend] was gentle, sensitive, and intuitive, qualities that appealed to the vulnerable core hidden beneath Margaret’s willful, confident exterior. When Townsend accompanied the royal family on a tour of South Africa in 1947, the two were in each other’s company every day. “We rode together every morning in that wonderful country, in marvelous weather,” the Princess told a confidante. “That’s when I really fell in love with him.”

For once, I know how it is to love that kind of man. That kind of man that seems more passive, quiet and probably duller than me but really…is the one silently supporting me from behind, is really the one shining, the one to hold me together. Gentle, sensitive, intuitive. The one that complements my fire, that wild spirit inside; the one who can tame it, nurture it, shape it without being burned himself. Rather decent and old-fashioned. “Easy qualities to mock,” Margaret says. “Easy to miss, too.”

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“I won’t let them send you away. I won’t.”

“Even though both Townsend and Margaret went on to marry others—with Margaret’s marriage to photographer Anthony Armstrong-Jones ending in its own scandalous divorce—Townsend was always considered to be the great love of Princess Margaret’s life.”

Perhaps we only fall in love once, and that happened when we least expect it, or that one romance early in life that was everything. Then as we grow older we just find people who fulfil our ‘checklists’…financial security, tick. Appropriate age gap, tick. Preferred race, tick. Similar values, a similar religion, tick. Royals have to marry royals. Easier to live together this way. A safe route.

But if you have a checklist is that really love?

I always believe love is just…unexplainable. It just happens, you just love a person, you don’t know why. If you say, “well, he’s so cute,” or “well, he’s just the sweetest being ever, so responsible and romantic,” then perhaps you’re in love with his qualities, qualities that fulfil your requirement in a lover. Of course, that’s not to say we shouldn’t appreciate or look out for these qualities, but if these qualities become the reason you love someone, then…chances are you’re letting it define your relationship, and when that crumbles, your marriage would crumble, too.

Loving has no explanation. It is loving the person, embracing their flaws (unless they assault you or whatever then please go to the police la) HAHHAA.

Maybe there is such a fine line between requirements and real love, that we don’t know what’s the difference anymore. All I know is I felt strongly, that Margaret’s great love is Peter Townsend, that one love that we will never forget no matter what, that one precious love early in your teens that if it has worked out for you, you know you’re the lucky ones.

Midnight in Paris

Watched a film I put off for a long time, Midnight in Paris last night. Before I played it I already knew I would not only enjoy it, but it would resonate deeply with me.

I was having a bad day, but Midnight in Paris totally cheered me up and transported me to another world.

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Plot: A writer travels back through time in Paris in the 1920s every night, and mingles with famous writers and painters to get inspiration.

Wow. For a start, ok, this film is a visual feast. The filming locations are usually outdoors, in beautiful locations, so romantic, so picturesque. The soundtrack, oh my god, it accompanies everything. The jazz…so relaxing, it’s really my type of music. That’s how it drew me in.

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That’s exactly how I see the world, through those lenses of fantasy, taking in the charming allure of the city. I think that’s why I have such strong attachment to my Europe trip. I romanticise places. A lot.

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The lines in the film are also exceptionally beautiful and inspiring for me as a designer, writer, artist, content creator.

THE CONCEPT OF CREATING

But Midnight in Paris is not just that. It’s about content creation, inspiration, ambition. The power of believing and giving a shot. Probably too late to be a writer, but I do believe people have what it takes inside of them to succeed.

“We all fear death and question our place in the universe. The artist’s job is not to succumb to despair, but to find an antidote to the emptiness of existence.”

I think that’s the highest form of calling. I think this is what I’ve been searching for all along. I recently came across this Japanese concept ‘ikigai’ online, which means ‘the reason for being’. It means combining doing what you love, what you’re good at and what the world needs all at the same time. I think what the world needs is an antidote to the emptiness of existence. I do believe I have the antidote—God, of course—but not everyone believes in God and some people even pushes away the gospel. I’m afraid I don’t have it all figured out, I want to help people, but I don’t know how to…and I’m still trying to figure out how to present my antidote to the world in another way. Though I’m not going to pressure myself, because I believe all things come in its own timing. As an aspiring writer/artist, seeing how they talk about art in the film is…rather confronting. Real art is confronting I think. It might be harrowing, but I think in a sense it questions our being and through that, encourages people to find their own ‘ikigai’.

Anyways watching the artists at work just makes me very very inspired, to bring my abstract concepts to the world.

The question is what can I offer?

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The film inspires me because it tells me it’s never too late to start. Yes, I’m young, but I always believe our time on earth is very limited. Gil (the main character) took a real shot at being a writer, to me, he’s inspiring. This sounds cliche, but pursuing our dreams is inspiring, no matter how old you are. And if you’re in a field like accountancy, or medicine, or law, those professions usually have a fixed path, a corporate ladder—but in my field, the world of content creation, the creative industry, we hustle and hustle in obscurity. I have lost track of the times where I felt so unheard, my voice so insignificant and soft. This film then is so peculiar, because Gil is also a normal, insignificant person that gets to hang out with the greatest giants of the literary world—F Scott Fitzgerald, Ernest Hemingway, Pablo Picasso.

THE CONCEPT OF LOVING

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“I believe that love is true and real and create a respite from death. All cowardice comes from not loving, or not loving well, which is the same thing. And when the man who is brave and true looks at death squarely in the face, it is because they love with sufficient passion, to push death out of their minds.” —Ernest Hemingway

I know this. I know this full well because I had a man give up on us because of his fears.

Because he was too afraid. Afraid of exactly what, I don’t know.

Afraid of commitment, afraid of poverty, afraid that he wouldn’t be able to carry the heavy crown on my head.

“I’m sure you’ll be a very successful designer.”
“So what? Why does it scare you if, just if, I’m more successful than you?”

But whatever the fears are, all fears stem from one fear—the fear of death.
We are sinful beings that deserve death in the first place. Perhaps the reason why we’re so fearful of the future and about the little things in life is that we know death is the unavoidable outcome, and we try so hard to make our lives matter.

I had asked him, “Do you like me enough?”
I’d like to think the hidden connotation to my question was, “Do you like me enough to call it real love?”

He couldn’t answer.

Maybe the answer is no. Perhaps it has been no all along, because if cowardice comes from not loving, then the answer is simply not loving.

I saw and I loved. I loved wholly, though flawed, but wholly. I know it is for three years. I loved enough to brave the storms, to push death out of my mind, I loved enough to disregard all flaws, and I love that about myself.

That was a question I had asked him for a long time and both of us couldn’t figure it out. Maybe it’s a question not targeted at him but targeted at myself. I needed a conclusion, the concept of either loving or not loving, when in actual fact, the greatest, most perfect love of all, from God, is enough to push death out of my own mind.

I’d like to think my love for him could possibly push his fears out, however regrettably, if only he believed in the power of love.

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AN OBSESSION WITH THE PAST

Funnily enough, this week’s lecture in my University talked about the topic of retro culture as well! This ties in nicely with the idea in the film where characters obsess over the past and, as a result, travels through time. My lecturer says, every generation seems to admire the previous, which is exactly the same insight this film is giving. For example, the millenials of today would admire the 50s, or 60s; and the 50s kids would admire the 20s, and the people of the 20s era would think that the Renaissance Age is the Golden age. Perhaps why we’re constantly obsessing over the nostalgic past is because we just want to escape from our every day (unsatisfactory) lives, and the thought that we would be happier elsewhere….well, do you think that’s what’s happening to me? The fact that wished I lived in a different era.

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Not to mention my baby Tom Hiddleston is inside- as F Scott Fitzgerald. Although the scenes he appeared in are very little, funnily, coz I didn’t choose to watch this movie because of him. But he’s so dashing as usual, and this is the first time I see him light a cig!

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I am probably taking a trip again soon. Maybe, just maybe, this time, I will ditch my camera, and write my way through.

Marvel

Here’s my favorite quote from Captain America:

“A strong man who has known power all his life lose respect for that power, but a weak man knows the value of strength, and knows compassion.”

And Spiderman Homecoming:

Peter Parker: I’m nothing without the suit.
Tony Stark: The more you shouldn’t have it.

How true. The things we hold onto most tightly are the exact things we should let go. Because if not, it becomes an unhealthy idol, the more we can’t live without it, the more danger we put ourselves to, let ourselves and our worth be defined by it.

I realize I can learn so much from Marvel. Thor used to think he’s nothing without his hammer. The more he shouldn’t have it, because it actually hurts him. After it has been taken away from him, how much true potential within him was uncovered?

And Doctor Strange:

Ancient One: Arrogance and fear still keep you from learning the simplest and most significant lesson of all.
Strange: Which is?
Ancient One: It is not about you.

but really at heart, Doctor Strange is about losing one of the things that define you (in this case, his work) and this sense of salvation when you embark on a journey to rediscover yourself.

Forget self-pity and panic and pride. What will be your mission now?

Something that I always ask myself whenever I fall.

Poetry in Motion

Want to take this time to blog about the two films I’ve seen while on the plane—Call Me By Your Name and The Greatest Showman. One is a musical, the other is almost poetry in motion…but both had awesome soundtracks. They left me stunned, my hours on the plane wasn’t wasted at all, in fact, it was spent in ultimate bliss in appreciation of good films.

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“The noblest art is that of making others happy.”
—The Greatest Showman, PT Barnum

This was my favourite scene out of the whole movie: the dancing on the rooftop scene. I particularly liked the development of the story between Charity and Barnum, because their whole love story was told. From their childhood times to falling in love, building a family, then building a career. It doesn’t just tell a very cheesy cliche love story, it shows the very practical side of family life and the most common hardships and issues that affect marriages: financial status. I love how the story also focuses on marriage as Barnum struggles to build a career for himself. I am always a firm believer that a silent, supporting woman behind a man’s back can make a huge difference when it comes to his career.

My favourite song is Tightrope because of that. I truly relate to how Charity feels, and I think in many ways, Charity and I are very alike. Both of us don’t mind following a man with humble beginnings; I don’t think I need a man that’s already successful. But sadly, many men think that they have to be successful before they have the right to marry. Barnum wasn’t born with a silver spoon, hence always felt the need to prove himself. It started off masked as an excuse that he wanted to provide a better life for his kids and family, but it shows that the heart is deceitful and he is still not satisfied, that he just wants the show to be successful internationally so he can prove himself to the world and to Charity’s parents. I know because having been through a somewhat similar experience, knew someone who gave up on something potentially beautiful simply because he let ambition overtake his loved ones. I never blamed him, but just wished I had the chance to tell him what Charity said to Barnum.

Barnum: “I wanted to be more than I was.”
Charity: “I never wanted anything than the man I fell in love with.” 

Some people long for a life that is simple and planned. Some people long for safety, control, hate uncertainty. I never minded walking the tightrope with my loved ones, as long as I’m with them. Charity risked everything just to be with him, and eventually, Barnum learns that that most important thing is friendship, love, and work that he adores. It is not profit, money, or fame or power or getting invited to parties. I think this is a very important aspect of work that we have to keep in mind, especially people like us in the creative business. We don’t have a corporate ladder to climb, but we do have lots of content creation and putting our content we need a certain fame in order to be a successful artist, musician, painter, designer, whatever.

This gave me another reason to like the musical: it shows me very meaningful insights into start-up businesses. For a start, I was so inspired. He started and created a show from scratch. One of his greatest strengths is being able to persuade others – usually those high profile names – to work and collaborate with him. He gets that in on his idea and sells it well. The circus troupe, opera singer, Phillip…He demonstrated a vision that drew them in. He led them to believe in the same vision he had. The first step is to identify your vision and be very clear on what you want. He also sees others strengths clearly and how it would help his career. Then he acts on it accordingly, asking them to help him out.

Home Again reminds me of the two sides of me: the side of me when I’m on the road livin a gypsy-like, carefree life, and the other side when I’m home again: the family and hometown that has always kept me grounded. I guess, for now, I’m on the former.

CALL ME BY YOUR NAME

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“Is it better to speak or to die?”

The most beautiful moment, I find, on CMBYN would be the scene where Elio’s mum tells him a story, where a handsome young knight is in love with a princess. He was so humbled and speechless by his desire that he’s unable to bring up the subject of love. I knew someone who kept quiet about love for a few years. It wasn’t easy, but sometimes the most beautiful of feelings we don’t talk about. CMBYN’s sex scene was absolutely beautiful. I love how Oliver was very quiet about this whole thing, especially his feelings, that Elio didn’t even know he left hints. The part where Elio questioned him “When?? When did you leave hints?” was so cute. I feel like Elio, always the one who gets busted first.

Also, can I just say the place where they filmed was so pretty! The scenery is so nice in Northern Italy. I also love the motif of books in the film. Both of them read a lot. I don’t know why but because of that I am so determined to find a reading spot in my university, in this beautiful European summer, and sit down by the lake or something with a good book. A reading spot where I can retreat to read on stressful days.

“I like reading too, but I don’t tell anyone. I think people who read are kind of secretive. They hide who they really are.

I love Elio’s family life. His parents are so so supportive. My family has always brought out the worst version of me (in my opinion, even though my worst version isn’t that worse haha) but I feel slightly more frustrated when I’m with them. Not because I don’t love them, but that’s just the dynamics of it I guess. I have to start praying about this now hahahah. I need someone who brings out the best in me, and since family is the most important basis of all relationships, I think home is not a place for negative energy at all. My parents are amazing, awesome people, and I love them, and they’ve worked incredibly hard to provide for me. However, I also realise it is this time that I am away from home for the longest that I am also being the best version of myself. I have matured in ways I did not expect, and sometimes, I forget that side of the old me even existed.

Anyway, I realise I also desperately needed soundtracks for CMBYN and The Greatest Showman. Quick.

BBC Sherlock Review

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I just finished Sherlock over the past few days and oh my goodness, it is, truly a masterpiece. This is a show that made television history, took London by storm, and has a huge and patient fanbase that waited for years and years just for Season 4. I myself watched Season 1 when I was really young, like maybe when I was seventeen years old, and stopped there. Yet, it remained at the back of my mind and I never really forgot about it. Something that captured me as a young audience, though I do not quite know how to read between the lines and analyze the complicated crimes, was Sherlock’s deductions. That was the thing that kept me captivated and drew me back in again as a fan 4 years later.

I’m 21 now, and amazingly enough, started Sherlock Season 2 just after my 21st birthday. Having left for such a long time, it did not feel hard to come back at all, but this time taking on a storyline with a more mature perspective, I begin to see what a complex character Sherlock was and the different layers and layers of personality Benedict Cumberbatch injected upon this character in order to bring it to life.

Perhaps the overriding theme that I found most attractive was Sherlock’s character development, his humanness, we can see how much the character has grown since Season 1 and I am so proud of him. We can see how he might react differently to the same things. One of the most touching scenes was when Sherlock said, “Taking your own life…interesting expression. Taking it from who? Once it’s over, it’s not you who will miss it. Your own death is something that happens to everybody else. Your life is not your own, keep your hands off it.” and then you realise he said that because he saw how his beloved John grieved over Mary’s death, and then you realise this is an example of how pain changes people. The writers did not just add that line in to show Sherlock’s compassion in saving the suicidal woman, but it shows Sherlock’s empathy and his lessons learned from pain.

Many people watched Season 4 and said it was absolute shit, disappointing, whatever. Due to the bad reviews, many fans avoided Season 4 fearing that it might spoil the whole show for them. Many are satisfied with the ending in Season 3. I highly doubt there’ll be a fifth season, so I’m going to talk as if Season 4 is the last one. I loved Season 4, even though it does not queerbait as much. It does not ship #JohnLock as much, and yes, the friendship between Sherlock Holmes and John Watson is so ruined it is almost painful for me to watch. But Season 4 made me realise it is Sherlock who has fallen so deeply in love for John, maybe even more than he himself realises. More than what John realises. He blames himself for Mary’s death, stating “she gave my life a value, a currency which I do not know how to spend.” and that part just broke me. Sherlock is SO HUMAN in Season 4, a side of him the audience yearns to see for so long. Therefore, I personally liked Season 4 and I think it is worth watching.

Let’s talk about queerbaiting. Some people might see John and Sherlock as strictly platonic, but I do really think Sherlock has feelings for John, although I’m not sure if it is reciprocated. BBC Sherlock is full of gay subtext. It hints at Johnlock strongly. In Season 4, those feelings that Sherlock has kept buried inside him for so long, finally resurfaced when it is tested to its limits.

Season 3 is like the end of an era because John got married. Sherlock’s back, but things changed after 2 years. Season 3 &4’s visual effects and camera technique is so good. It is literally a work of art and visual feast for the eyes. I’ve seen the behind the scenes and production for it and it is so awesome!!

Word of warning though: Season 4 has also hurt me in so many levels. It practically haunts its viewer, episode after episode, with dark themes and very traumatic things happening to Sherlock. You’ll feel very sorry for him. Watching S4 hits me with a wave of nostalgia for S1 & 2. The light-heartedness of crime-solving in S1 & 2 seems like a very long, long, time ago; in a far, far away place…almost like visiting an old home. Watching Sherlock in Season 4, for me, was like looking through a mirror.

“It’s not a pleasant thought, John, but I have this terrible feeling from time to time that we might all just be human.”

I think precisely why I can relate to it is because I realized I’m a lot like Sherlock. Sherlock was an emotional child, with his dog Redbeard and everything, and then he loses a sense of what really happened to him, cos adult Sherlock later finds out that his dog doesn’t exist at all. It is a perfect example of burying one’s emotions until you are emotionless, and the things we have learned to keep quiet about have seemed to fade over time. Being quiet and reserved when I want to be, and I don’t deny that I like that side of me. Even better, I have managed to build up a bubbly and outgoing facade that makes everyone who meets me almost positively sure that I am an extrovert. I talk a lot, I tell everyone ‘everything’ about myself, but no one believes that ‘everything’ is only the tip of an iceberg, because ‘everything’ seems so much. Sometimes we don’t necessarily open up to people because we are not sure how mature they are, or how much they can empathize, or if our pain would ruin them.

In the final episode, Sherlock had to dig into his past ghosts and fears and we suddenly realize Sherlock’s got all these layers and layers of emotional context buried underneath him for all these years. They were so quiet, we were almost positive it didn’t exist. I was taken by surprise as I realized that the strongest aspects of Sherlock is not his brain, but his heart. He labels himself as a sociopath, thinks like a machine, is a heartless, apathetic character but Season 4’s character growth and revelations tell us that he’s actually more human than anyone else.

The loneliest people are the kindest, the saddest people smile the brightest, and the most damaged people are the wisest.

 

 

 

The imitation game

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I honestly love this film so much after watching it, and it’s not even because this is my favorite era to live in. Besides the era, it’s also one of my favourite genres—war. Well, these are just one of the bonus reasons!

5/5.

I can’t believe I took so long just to watch The Imitation Game. I was made aware of the existence of this film in 2015, yet only came to watch it this year. I remembered it was nominated for numerous Oscars, and Benedict Cumberbatch too, who plays Alan Turing.

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Yet another wildly arrogant, highly intellectual character who isn’t fit for human company. A particular detective, a surgeon…this time a mathematician. Oh, Benedict…

And also. This character doesn’t eat too!!! Always so engrossed in his work hahha. Sherlock doesn’t eat as well. And why is that these characters he plays always have trouble communicating with others?!?!?! ALL of these characters are narcissistic too. The similar pattern in the characters are so amusing

Oh and this is also my first Keira Knightly film!
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I think I was too busy noticing the differences between Alan Turing and Sherlock (both characters which Benedict played) throughout the film! But I can see why my friends love this film though. It’s suspenseful, but knowing that it’s a true story also breaks me a little, because of the lack of recognition Alan received. Breaking Enigma was his heart and soul, yet sadly, he’s one of the heroes that didn’t live to see his own glory. I would die really if I were put in his shoes, imagine pouring your heart and soul into a project that is only meant to be kept secret in the end and knowing all the peace that is out there which cannot be enjoyed without your work. Knowing that you have the ability to control other people’s fate, yet cannot breathe a word about it until you hit your grave.

I also especially love the love story between him and Joan Elisabeth. I thought it was just a cheesy love story added in a subplot, but turns out it’s a true story too! My favourite scene was when Alan proposed to her hahha. And the last scene when she was comforting him really broke my heart.

“Sometimes its the very people who no one imagines anything of who do the things no one can imagine.”

 

Patrick Melrose Review

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Hi guys! Haven’t been chatting in this space for quite some time now. I’m finally done with the semester and assignments, and I’ve had the time to just catch up with some books and movies! I just plan to spend this weekend chilling. My newfound love to films and fiction material is crazy. More to getting drunk in books and movies, haha.

Enough about personal life!

I just want to talk about a TV series I’ve just finished today. It’s a TV series about a dark show skewering the drug-addled, abusive upper classes. Patrick Melrose is a 5-episode TV series played by Benedict Cumberbatch, which is just about a man seeking journey from brokenness to redemption.

It starts off featuring the main character, Patrick, who grows up with the horrors of a twisted, abusive father and an alcoholic mother who seems powerless and isn’t there to help him at times. To put it simply, it is really just a heart-wrenching story about what the implications of a broken home does to a child. A child haunted by his past. The poison dripping down from generation to generation. To see how these things can crush a child and affect his growth is almost unbearable to watch. I’m not usually a fan of childhood trauma storylines, but I got into this one because Benedict Cumberbatch plays the grown-up, damaged Patrick Melrose, 5/5 stars with fucking amazing acting. The hallucinations, the seizures from drug withdrawals, the sudden bursts of anger….it was so amazing that I was angry the series was so short, why are Benedict’s dramas always so short??!??!

The first two episodes I watched last month, in the middle of my school’s hell week period, and ugh, the themes were really dark and heavy. Drugs, alcohol, sexual abuse, infidelity, drinking, smoking…the amount of cigs Cumberbatch smoked in the series is enough to give him lung cancer man. He swears every 5 minutes too. The amount of immorality there is astonishing, the brokenness apparent, but yet this series managed a good balance between light-heartedness and heaviness. I don’t know how they did it, but they managed to sneak a dose of wit and humour beneath the dark themes to make it somehow bearable for the audience. Even though there are sexual abuse and stuff, it’s implied, but not shown with actual explicit, graphic scenes, so don’t worry. But even so, the storyline alone is enough to make it horrifying to watch.

I think it’s so powerful because it’s a story about a man living in his past, and in order to walk out of his past, no one can help him except himself. I especially enjoy stories about good character development so I would say this is a top pick. Patrick was trying very hard and seeking some sort of salvation, and his recovering journey is just so accurately portrayed.

“Sometimes, those who deserve the most blame also deserve the most compassion.”

Besides talking about brokenness and redemption, it also talks about forgiveness and compassion. To forgive is to let go of his past. There are a lot of funeral scenes in the show, haha, and this tingling feeling of seeking…closure. The end of a chapter. Beginning of a new one. Things like that, all done in 5 episodes.

“poison dripping down from generation to generation”— to see Patrick treat his children poorly because of his own brokenness passed on from his dad, is quite crazy to watch because of the highly personal experience for me. The broken husband, shouting and nagging wife, and deeply troubled children. Child overhears the mum shouting at the dad, exposing all his dad’s faults, which leads to an utter disrespect and despise for the dad.

I don’t really wish to air any family dirty laundry here on my blog but I grew up in this type of family: where my mum constantly points out my dad’s flaws in front of me by shouting and nagging. I never consciously knew it had such an effect on me until I started watching Patrick Melrose. All too familiar, that I found my mum such a turn-off that I promised myself I would never take on the role of a shouting or nagging wife when I grow up. I wouldn’t say I disrespect my dad, I will still honour him and respect him, but I admit it was pretty hard looking up to him as a father figure with awe and admiration. I had wanted more than anything to be a daddy’s girl.

BRILLANT, BRILLANT, SHOW.

Not to mention the amazing cinematography and the colours used! Goshhh I love the aesthetics. Cumberbatch also got a few sex scenes in this show! He usually plays asexual, highly intellectual, gay, arrogant characters so this is a bit different hhahha.